“She Was Loved Every Second” — Kristine McNeil on the Loss of Her Daughter Banks and the Path to Her Rainbow Baby
In this tender and courageous episode of The Rainbow Connection, Kristine McNeil shares the story of her daughter Banks, the profound loss that reshaped her life, and the emotional landscape of navigating miscarriage, trying to conceive after loss, and pregnancy after loss. Kristine opens up about the early signs she tried to ignore, the intuition she wishes had been heard, and the grief that followed the moment everything changed. She also reflects on the journey toward her rainbow baby—what it meant to carry both fear and hope, how she rebuilt trust in her body, and the ways she continues to honour Banks in her motherhood today. This episode holds space for the complexity of stillbirth, pregnancy loss, healing after miscarriage, and the transformative path of motherhood after loss.
We talk about:
The early signs and intuition that something wasn’t right
The devastating moment of losing Banks
Navigating grief, trauma, and the unraveling that followed
The fear and emotional weight of trying to conceive after loss
How pregnancy after loss changed the way she trusted her body
Rebuilding connection with herself while honouring her baby
The birth of her rainbow baby and the emotions that came with it
Motherhood after loss and living with both grief and gratitude
The ways Banks continues to shape her life
What healing now looks like for Kristine
This episode is a tender, powerful reminder that grief and beauty can coexist—and that birth, even in loss, can be sacred.
Get to Know Kristine:
Kristine McNeil lives in Greenville, South Carolina with her husband, Shawn, and their three beautiful children Earthside—Cadence, Sutler, and Cash. She also carries the love of her daughter, Banks, who lives forever in her heart. Kristine is a devoted mother, a lover of home decorating, and someone who finds joy in cheering her kids on from the sidelines and spending time with the people she loves most. Having walked through profound grief, she approaches life with gratitude, tenderness, and a commitment to finding beauty and purpose in every moment.
Instagram: @kristineemcneil
