Jane Armstrong is a licensed clinical social worker certified in perinatal mental health, a TFMR and miscarriage mom, and the founder of Both/And Therapy, where she supports TFMR parents through therapy and support groups. In January 2021, at her 18-week anatomy scan, Jane learned that her son Frankie had the most severe form of spina bifida. Facing a ticking clock and no good options, Jane and her husband Will made the decision to end the pregnancy, and Frankie died in February 2021 at 21 weeks and 3 days. Since then, Jane has welcomed her living son Nolan, experienced two early miscarriages, and built a career supporting the TFMR parents who so often go unseen.
We talk about:
The anatomy scan that Jane calls the continental divide of her life
Making a decision for Frankie under a ticking clock, and what care looked like in Texas
The guilt, shame, and second-guessing so many TFMR parents carry
How care differs between TFMR, miscarriage, and from state to state
Why TFMR parents are so often left outside pregnancy and infant loss spaces
Pregnancy after loss, deciding to stop trying, and the family the world doesn't see
What TFMR parents need from the people who love them
This episode is a reminder that TFMR is baby loss, and that the parents who live it deserve compassion, support, and healing, not judgment.
Get to Know Jane:
Jane Armstrong, LCSW-S, QCSW, PMH-C, IPPE-C, is a native Texan now living in Colorado with her husband Will and their son Nolan. She is the founder of Both/And Therapy, PLLC, offering therapy and a virtual support group for TFMR parents, and the creator of @tfmrsocialworker on Instagram, where she works to raise awareness, reduce stigma, and help TFMR parents know they are not alone.
Website: bothandtherapy.com
Resources for TFMR families: bothandtherapy.com/resources
Virtual TFMR Support Group: bothandtherapy.com/virtual-tfmr-support-group
Instagram: @tfmrsocialworker
